As I began to love myself I understood how much it can offend somebody as I try to force my desires on this person, even though I knew the time was not right and the person was not ready for it, and even though this person was me. Today I call it “RESPECT“.
As I began to love myself I stopped craving for a different life, and I could see that everything that surrounded me was inviting me to grow. Today I call it “Maturity“.
As I began to love myself I understood that at any circumstance, I am in the right place at the right time, and everything happens at the exactly right moment, so I could be calm. Today I call it “SELF-CONFIDENCE“.
As I began to love myself I quit steeling my own time, and I stopped designing huge projects for the future. Today, I only do what brings me joy and happiness, things I love to do and that make my heart cheer, and I do them in my own way and in my own rhythm. Today I call it “SIMPLICITY“.
As I began to love myself I freed myself of anything that is no good for my health – food, people, things, situations, and everything the drew me down and away from myself. At first I called this attitude a healthy egoism. Today I know it is “LOVE OF ONESELF“.
As I began to love myself I quit trying to always be right, and ever since I was wrong less of the time. Today I discovered that is “MODESTY“.
As I began to love myself I refused to go on living in the past and worry about the future. Now, I only live for the moment, where EVERYTHING is happening. Today I live each day, day by day, and I call it “FULFILLMENT“.
As I began to love myself I recognized that my mind can disturb me and it can make me sick. But As I connected it to my heart, my mind became a valuable ally. Today I call this connection “WISDOM OF THE HEART“.
We no longer need to fear arguments, confrontations or any kind of problems with ourselves or others. Even stars collide, and out of their crashing new worlds are born.
How many of you have had bad feelings of dislike or good feelings of attraction towards a complete stranger, for no reason?
Following story from a Sikhreligious book illustrates one suh incident and teaches us how to counter such feelings and convert a foe into a friend.
In olden days when India was being ruled by Rajas (Kings), a merchant decided to get rich qickly and started a business of selling sandalwood hoping that people would prefer to use it in cremation of their dear ones. The things turned out to the contrary, as people could not afford to buy sandalwood due to its exhorbitant cost compared to ordinary wood. The merchant was in great financial difficulty and was hoping some rich person to die so that he could sell his sandalwood for his cremation.
It so happened that one day King of the State happened to pass by his shop with his Ministers and soldiers . A thought crossed the mind of merchant .. what if this King dies, then surely my entire stock of sandalwood will get sold out and I will recover my money.
On the other hand, King cast his look on merchant and for no reason felt hatredness with a thought of hanging the merchant to death. This thought disturbed King for several days. At last he called his wisest Minister and asked him to find out reason behind this.
The Minister disguised himself as an ordinary citizen and visited the merchant and in a friendly chat found out his wish and the reason for it. The Minister came and narrated it to the King and explained to him that it was because the merchant wanted him to die, the vibes of that thought created equal and opposite thought in the mind of King against the merchant. The King was himself a wise man and decided to put an end to this negative field between him and the merchant.
Next day he ordered that the merchant be presented before him.
Accordingly the Merchant was produced before him who stood with folded hands, trembling with fear. To the utter disbelief of merchant, the King expressed his desire to buy over his entire stock of sandalwood, ostensibly for a religious ceremony (havan). As soon as the merchant heard this, his negative feelings towards King turned into positive feelings, which in turn resulted the King's feelings towards merchant into positive ones.
Morale:You can win over a foe by taking an initiative yourself to do a favor to him, thereby weakening his feelings of animosity towards you.
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A saint asked his disciples, 'Why do we shout in anger? Why do people shout at each other when they are upset?'
Disciples thought for a while, one of them said, 'Because we lose our calm, we shout for that.'
'But, why to shout when the other person is just next to you?' asked the saint. 'Isn't it possible to speak to him or her with a soft voice? Why do you shout at a person when you're angry?'
Disciples gave some other answers but none satisfied the saint.
Finally he explained, 'When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other through that great distance.'
Then the saint asked, 'What happens when two people fall in love? They don't shout at each other but talk softly, why? Because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is very small...'
The saint continued, 'When they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love. Finally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and that's all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.'
MORAL: When you argue do not let your hearts get distant, do not say words that distance each other more, else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return.
When the world fails, and you know it will fail,
what way of life shall you live then?
When the governments collapse, and you know they will,
What power shall you rely on then?
When the dream of man reveals it's nightmare, and you already see that,
what dream shall you create then?
When the powers of earth lose control, and you know they are grasping,
what force shall you trust in then?
When someone comes forth to bring a new order, and you know it isn't your belief,
what faith shall you follow then?
When every man for himself will no longer put food in your children's belly,
and you see that time approaching,
What shall you do to nourish your Family then?
Inside us all, are there clues to our joint fundamentals.
Many of us are seekers of Good will.
Many of us are givers of Good will.
Only the principles that live on forever shall be reliable forever.
Only that which was before the beginning, and that which shall be after the end,
can a solid house be built upon.
Before Technology,
Before Science,
Before Society,
Before Governments,
Before Countries,
Before Armies,
Before Religions,
Before Tribes,
Before Culture,
Before Art.
Before Knowledge.
Before them all, and after them all will be the everlasting truth of Love.
Our culture todays treats Love as though it is a mushy, squishy, vain, lifeless, weak, foo-foo, feminine, girly-man idea only. Even now my own friends are looking upon my writing as though I have somehow gotten softer over the years. With my own ears have I heard them speak how they cannot even look upon my words because they are too wimpy for them.
Yet all the while, the very originator of love itself, is also the very originator of masculinity itself. Yet all the while the most powerful force in all the universe, responsible for the universe itself, proves continually that Love itself is the ONLY foundational principle of the universe that has been and always shall be.
Only the strong survives, all else, that is truly weak and truly despot fails.
Societies Fail,
Ideas Fail,
Governments Fail,
Man's Laws Fail,
Armies Fail,
Countries Fail,
Will fails,
The strong become weak and die,
The powerful become powerless and crumble.
Even a flower... can destroy the strongest man with an allergy.
Yet who has been destroyed by Love?
If there is a devil, then no doubt that force of vanity surly would put fear of love into the minds of men. No doubt that force of illogic would force upon another the idea of love as the weakness, rather then death as the weakness. No doubt Men and women would live within a time when love would be considered futile, unobtainable, indescribable, confusing, reckless, hurtful, and ultimately in vain. No doubt a pervasive and cunning idea would want men to become speakers of love, praising love, who actually know nothing about love at all! It works out well for death... that the only protagonists of love appear to be weak, unintelligent simple minded dolts living in a fairy-tale of unrealistic ideals. Yet love still is the only surviving force encompasing the universe as a whole. As every religion has thankfully not forgotten... it is truly the ONLY law there is.
Love itself removes the need for any other law.
No doubt if there is an untruth, devil, death, illogic, un-knowledge, force of ill-will in the universe... then that force would desire that we no longer remember what love actually is.
We try as we will to remember.
We write songs, poems, notes, letters, books, and create groups to recall actual love.
We seek, explore, discover, long for, ask for, desire, wish and hope for love.
We give, create, build, mold, shape, and try to grow love in another.
We do all we can continually for the sake of love.
Yet still do we seem to believe in love as vanity.
I believe our fundamental problem with love is that we see it from only one side at a time.
Either we are trying to give love, or we are trying to get love.
They say that Love can change the world. And this is TRUE... but only if that love is received.
They say that all you need is Love, and this is TRUE... but you will not have it if it is not given.
How many of us have tried to GIVE love to a mate, a brother, a friend... who refused it?
How many of us have tried to GET love from another who would not give it?
It has been said that it is better to give, then to receive. This idea has long been mistaken for value of one over the other. It is not a lesson that receiving is wrong or somehow less valuable. It is a lesson which reminds us that through Giving, we also do receive, if our giving was done so purely for the intent to give... and not for the intent to purchase love or kindness from another. If I expect a certain response from you, then I am in effect doing a business transaction, rather then an act of love. If I desire that you should respond to my gift in a certain manner... then I am treating you as a whore, and wish to buy your affection.
IF however, i see in my own life how much I love it when someone scratches my back... and I go to scratch theirs because they itch... then I have given to another the very thing that I myself LOVE! In passing that on... I also give it to myself. BUT, if I have an expectation that YOU must respond a certain way... then I cut myself off from receiving my own love, in favor of receiving yours. Then my gift comes with a price that YOU must pay. Then my gift comes with an obligation on YOUR part... that YOU must conform to.
That isn't love.
Love must be received. It can however be received by the giver, to the giver.
If it is also received by the one who you have given it too... then the rewards are quadrupled.
Because in giving, you receive when done so with love.
And when received by another, they too understand and know your reception of self also.
You receive twice, and they receive twice... PLUS the gift given.
But if you demand they receive so that you can feel love, then you may or may not receive your own love back... AND you and them will only feel the effect of a good business deal.
You won't feel the effect of love.
I would venture to say, that any man who has lived a life where they give with any expectation of how it is received... has not ever known the effect of love. I would be bold enough to say they have only known the effect of purchasing a toy. Toys themselves will also fail, and are discarded. But actual LOVE never does.
One very large problem I have witnessed in my brothers, is that they lack the desire to receive love. Of course they would, when the love they have known has come with a Price! Would wants to be a prostitute? Who wants to be the family wallet? Who wants to have a HONEY-DO list? Who wants to be the arms and legs and labor worker of a family for payment of possible affection? I know of no one who desires this. I know of many who live this way. Men and women who give with expectation... BOTH create and support the culture of purchasing effecting at a price. Unfortunately for us all... that business deal is ALWAYS in negotiation and none of it has any security to it.
To give real Love is also to receive real love from within.
To receive real love is also to Give real love to ones self and to the giver.
Love given to one who refuses, does nothing for the receiver.
Love not given to one who is seeking, does nothing for the seeker.
We cannot force love upon another. The very principle of love forbids that possibility. Love must be received freely, and given freely... because Love is the foundation of Freedom.
The very best we can hope for, is to create love, and have that love received not only by us alone, but also by all. I am so blessed, to have a wife who receives love and gives love freely without desire for record keeping or score taking. It seems my life's work in myself is to wipe-out all those old ideas that Love is outside of me and something I must be worthy of.
We cannot use our will to master love, for love is the master of our Will, and not the other way around. Love is OUR teacher, and we are not the teachers of Love. Love is OUR ruler and commander, and we are not the rulers and commanders of love. Love is the gift of the Universe itself.
R - respectful, responsible, reassure
E - educate, encourage, evolve
S - sincere, sympathetic, support
P - praise, practice, patience
E - encouragement, enjoyment, enthusiasm
C - communicate, cuddle, compliment
T - truth, trust, tenderness
F - faithfulness, fulfillment, fun
U - understand, unite, uplift
L - listen, learn, love, laugh
It is in the fire that the intensity of the clay is tested and its spirit is allowed to dance. It is in the fire where the fierce light pierces to the core and the once fragile become strong. It is in the fire where an individual piece of clay claims its own true identity. Some of the most beautiful pieces will crumble under the extreme conditions because the potter did not take the time to knead the air bubbles on the inside while other average looking pieces will get stronger and take on whole new identities. Whatever the case, the process is not
complete until the clay has had its time in the fire.
The constituents of this universe are soul, matter, motion,rest, space, and time. Of these six, only soul is aware. I have to reach that state in which I know these unknown. Then what I do I will do out of fearlessness.
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