How long do you worry about your kids???

Is there an imaginary cutoff period when
offspring become accountable
for their own actions?

Is there some wonderful moment when
parents can become
detached spectators in
the lives of their children and shrug,
'It's Their life,' and feel nothing?


When I was in my twenties,
I stood in a hospital corridor
waiting for doctors to put a few stitches
in my daughter's head and I asked,
'When do you stop worrying?'
The nurse said,
'When they get out of the accident stage..'
My Parents just smiled faintly
and said nothing.


When I was in my thirties,
I sat on a little chair in a classroom
and heard how one of my children
talked incessantly, disrupted the class,
and was headed for a career making license plates.
As if to read my mind, a teacher said,
'Don't worry, they all go through this stage
and then you can sit back,
relax and enjoy them.'
My Parents just smiled
faintly
and said nothing.


When I was in my forties,
I spent a lifetime waiting
for the phone to ring,
the cars to come home,
the front door to open.
A friend said,
'They're trying to find themselves.
'Don't worry!
In a few years, they'll be adults.
'They'll be off on their own
they'll be out of
your hair'
My Parents just smiled faintly
And said nothing.



By the time I was 50,
I was sick & tired of being vulnerable.
I was still worrying over my children,
but there was a new wrinkle..
Even though they were on their own
I continued to anguish over their failures,
be tormented by their frustrations and
absorbed in their disappointments..
and there was nothing I could do about it.
My Parents just smiled faintly
and said nothing.



My friends said that
when my kids got married
I could stop worrying
and lead my own life.
I wanted to believe that,
but I was haunted by my parent's warm smiles
and their occasional,
'You look pale. Are you all right' ?
'Call me the minute you get home'.
Are you depressed about something?'


My friends said that
when I became a grandparent
that I would get to enjoy
the happy little voices yelling
Grandma! Papa!
But now I find that I worry
just as much about the little kids
as the big ones.
How can anyone cope
with all this
Worry?



Can it be that parents are sentenced
to a lifetime of worry?
Is concern for one another
handed down like a torch
to blaze the trail of human frailties
and the fears of the unknown?
Is concern a curse or is it
a virtue that elevates us
to the highest form of earthly creation?


Recently, one of my own children
became quite irritable,
saying to me,
'Where were you?
I've been calling for 3 days,
and no one answered
I was worried.'
I smiled a warm smile.
The torch has been passed.

I aspire ...

Image by jsymmetry via FlickrMay every being remain happy.

May there be no enmity, immorality or pride.

May the virtues prevail in all.

May there be no perils.

May there be no drought.

May there be no illness.

May everyone live in peace.

May there be compassion every where.

May no one speak malice.

May we always remain to be a responsible citizen.

By developing the understanding the nature of sustances, I develop courage to face adversity.

I do not fear...

Image via WikipediaI do not fear bad or good wishes.

I do not fear money loss.

I do not fear death.

I do not fear to walk on the virtues path.

I do not fear the perils.

May I never compromise in my virtues for fear anything.

My Feelings...

Image via WikipediaMy feelings of friendliness for all.

My feelings of sympathy for the poor and miserable.

My feelings of indifference for the ill-virtued.

My feelings of praise, appreciation for people with virtues.

May I always look at good qualities of others and not their follies.

I keep away from...

Image by Su℮ ❥ via Flickr
I keep away from the five infirmities of Causing Injury, Lying, Stealing,, Impurity in Relation and Excessiveness.

I keep away from the four passions of Anger, Pride, Deciet and Greed.

I choose to be simple, truthful and helpful towards all.

I Revere

Image by Christolakis via FlickrI revere 'God' who dissolved the bondage's of Affection for worldly desires, feeling of hatred, indulgence in pleasure of body senses;

I revere 'God' who has in his experience known the universal truth;

I revere 'God' who has shown the path of Moksha, ultimate happiness, to all;

I revere 'Monk' who has no material desires, who practice virtues within oneself and equanimity towards all.

Prayer for Forgiveness. . .

#1 - Living, loving Spirit, let me practice forgiveness today by starting with the little hurts. I will let go of all the everyday occurrences that do not go the way I want, and the moment I begin to feel the familiar feeling of anger or resentment, I will practice forgiveness by invoking your loving and peaceful Presence and allowing divine grace to surround me. And so it is.

#2 - Living, loving Presence, I enter this moment of silence and consciously make the decision to unburden and detach myself from the painful memories of the past. I release to you everything that holds me back from my spiritual journey. I feel your power working in and through me in forgiving and letting go all that needs to be forgiven and released. And so it is.

Paryushan & Festival of Forgiveness

Paryushan is the most important Jain religious observance of the year.

Paryushan Parva lasts 10 days; (two popular titles of this festival, viz. (1) ‘Paryushan Parva’ and (2) ‘Dashlakshan Parva’ are in vogue). The festival ordains the Jain’s to observe the ten (10) universal supreme virtues in daily practical life. This is a time of intensive study, reflection and purification.

It takes place in the middle of the rainy season, in the auspicious month ‘Bhadrapad’ of the Jain calendar extends from the fifth day to fourteenth day of the bright fortnight, a time when Jain monks and nuns cease travelling and stay with a community and are available to them for instruction and guidance. It is also a time when the laity takes on various temporary vows of study and fasting, a spiritual intensity similar to temporary monasticism. Paryushan concludes with a time of confession and forgiveness for the transgressions of the previous year.

Even if there are no religious leaders in residence, the laity meets every day during Paryushan, shifting their focus of life to the soul for these days. The most important part of Paryushan is daily meditation and prayer, which provides an opportunity for looking within and looking toward the teachings of the Tirthankaras for guidance. Jain’s often take time off from work during this period and eat a much simpler diet.

Select Jain’s also fast during Paryushan, some for the entire period. At the end of Paryushan, those who have fasted for the 10/31 days; break their fast with a special meal during which they do not touch food, but are fed by friends and loved ones in honor of their achievement.

One cannot consume any fruits or even a grain in our upvaas (fast) except water. We live in a sea of energy. Our bodies gain energy indirectly from the food we eat, while we gain direct energy from the cosmic energy that flows into us through the medulla oblongata at the bottom of the brain. But this kind of acceptance of energy depends upon our mental set-up. The greater the will, the greater would be the flow of energy.

Penance is given high importance to purify one's soul. In the time cycle, Lord Rishabh started the penance for one year at a stretch. The same tradition is followed even today. During the process of penance, all the accumulated toxins in the cells of the body over a period of time start to melt away. Since the body's energies are concentrated in cleaning and detoxification during the fasting process, rest becomes a necessary adjunct. The body parts are recharged and relaxed. This minimizes physical ailments, increases strength and keeps body, mind and the hormonal balance in check.

Its origin is related to the staying of the monks in one place for the rainy season. ‘Paryushan’ is staying of the monks in one place. In popular terminology this stay is termed ‘chaturmas’ because the rainy season is regarded to be about four months.

Paryushan means, literally, "abiding" or "coming together". It is also a time when the laity takes on vows of study and fasting with a spiritual intensity similar to temporary monasticism. Paryushan concludes with a time of confession and forgiveness for the transgressions of the previous year.

Paryushan Parva -Definition / Translation:

The word "Parva" means auspicious day. The word "Paryushan" has several different meanings:

1. Pari + ushan = all kinds + to burn = to burn (shed) our all types of karmäs. To shed our karmäs, we do twelve different types of austerities including fasting.

2. Another meaning of "ushan" is to stay closer. To stay closer to our own soul from all directions and to stay absorbed in our own-self (soul), we do Svädhyäya (self-study), meditation, austerities, etc., and

3. Pari + upshamanä = upshamanä means to suppress, to suppress our passions (kashäyas - anger, ego, deceit and greed) from all directions.

According to Sanskrit grammar the underlying idea of the festival and its interpretation is given below:

“Parismantadushayante dhante karmani yasimannasau paryushanam”

· The celebration through which the karmic matter attached to the soul is totally burnt or vanquished (both internally and externally) is known Paryushan (self-purification).

Therefore:

· The real purpose of the Paryushan is to purify our soul by staying closer to our own soul, to look at our own misdeeds, to ask for forgiveness for the mistakes we have committed, and to take vows to minimize our faults and passions. We try to forget about the needs of our body (like food) and our business so that we can concentrate on our self.

· Paryushan is a festival of self-discipline through fasting and other ascetic practices.

· Men, women and children as well as monks and nuns undertake fasts with varying strictness.

They celebrate ten best characteristics of the soul:

1. Kshamä (forgiveness), Total lack of anger

2. Märdav (Humility), Lack of pride

3. Ärjav (straightforwardness), Lack of cunning

4. Shauch (content - absence of greed), Lack of cunning

5. Satya (truth), Lack of falsehood.

6. Samyam (restraint of all senses), Control over physical violence

7. Tapa (austerities), Austerity is repentance of one's sins

8. Tyäga (charity), Giving up possessions both internal and external

9. Äkinchan (non-possessiveness), Lack of attachment

10. Brahmachärya (celibacy), Abstaining from sexual relations

The festival ordains the Jain’s to observe the above mentioned ten universal supreme virtues in daily practical life. Besides assuring a blissful existence in this world and the other world for every living being, it aims at the attainment of salvation - the supreme ideal for mundane soul.

Jain community, as a whole, high and low, young and old, and males and females, participate with full vigor and zeal in the various religious rituals and cultural programs. They listen with rapt attention to the holy sermons of the Saints and learned Jain scholars arranged during the ten-day festival. In these celebrations lie dormant the seeds of the well being, peace and happiness of the common man. On the eve of this festival all activities, which add to social discord or bitterness are declared taboo from the temple pulpits.

These celebrations harbinger social harmony and amity and preach the lofty Jain motto:

‘Live and Let live’.

Forgiveness
At the conclusion of the festival, the followers request each other for forgiveness for all offenses committed during the last year.

This occurs on Pratipada (first) of Ashwin Krashna (Jain Calendar).

This ritual of forgiveness is sometimes called the rite of "universal friendship." Most Jain centers even in the U.S. now conduct at least part of the ritual of forgiveness in English for the benefit of the youth.

There are several great aphorisms (Sutras) to ask for forgiveness with the unity of the body, speech and mind, and one of them is as follows:

Khämemi Savve Jivä, Savve Jivä Khamantu Mi
Mitti Me Savva bhuesu, Veram majjham na Kenai.

I grant forgiveness to all living beings, May all living beings grant me forgiveness; my friendship is with all living beings, my enmity is totally non-existent. Let there be peace, harmony, and prosperity for all.

The process of shedding our karmäs really begins by asking for forgiveness with true feelings, and to take some vows not to repeat mistakes. The quality of the forgiveness requires humility (vinay - absence of ego) and suppression of anger.

Therefore, the real purpose of the Paryushan is to purify our soul by staying closer to our own soul, to look at our own faults, to ask for forgiveness for the mistakes we have committed, and take vows to minimize our faults.

Paryushan Parva gives expression to the perfectly purified trait of the soul, through which one gets rid of worldly discords and allurements and one gets fully absorbed in the eternal truth on experiencing and realizing the true nature of soul. In other words we can say that the natural realization of the trio ‘the True, the Good and the Beautiful’ is fully possible only through Paryushan. In fact the other name of the Jainism, which is universal religion, is Paryushan. This festival puts an end to all evils in man; gives him realization of the eternal bliss, and spiritualism becomes alive by the celebration of this festival.

Paryushan Parva is a grand Jain festival of self-introspection, self-enlightenment and, self-achievement, which, ultimately leads to the one and only one final goal, i.e., liberation or salvation.

Namokar Mahamantra

Image via Wikipedia

Namo Arihantanam

I bow to the Arihants (God) who are ever perfect spiritual beings.

Namo Siddhanam

I bow to the Siddhas (God) who are the liberated souls.

Namo Ayariyanam

I bow to the Achaaryas (Saadhu, Guru) who are the leaders of Order.

Namo Uvajzayanam

I bow to the Upaadhyaayes (Preachers) who are the learned preceptors.

Namo Loe Savva Sahoonam

I bow to all the Saadhus (Possessionless Monk) in the world.

Eso Pancha Namokaro

Savva Pava Ppanasano

Mangalanam cha Savvesim

Padhamam Havai Mangalam

This fivefold obeisance mantra, destroys all sins and obstacles, and of all auspicious repetitions, is the first and foremost.

Welcome to the world of Navkar, the world of immeasurable bliss, joy, and pure truth. Solutions offered through this Mahamantra are supposed to provide the reciter with great spiritual and material success, removes all evil and negative tendencies of the mind, destroy various aspects of misery and give divine peace of mind while removing any obstacles that may come in the way of individual's spiritual and material growth. Thus the mantra is attributed with powerful healing and curative properties. This Mahamantra can take man to the pinnacles of spirituality and holiness.