Thoughts for Meditation

"Let me turn my consciousness away from the temporary dependencies and connect with the pure stream of Life which is prevailing. Merging with that consciousness, I find my everlasting protection, my inner world."

Thank you and Sorry!

Image by bp6316 via Flickr

Thank you and sorry are perhaps the first words we learn. And they stay with us right through our lives as yardsticks of our civility.

But when was the last time we said “thank you” or “sorry” without meaning to simply offload our burden of obligation or guilt? Indeed, these words no longer express what they are supposed to. Instead, they are used flippantly, thrown around without care, often reduced to an easy way of getting off the hook and evading meaningful action.

They may well be the most used words in times of political correctness. But they are clearly the most abused as well. The emotions of gratitude and apology are vital to the chain of human reciprocity. But in stripping them of sincerity, we also seem to be closing the doors on their benefits for us.

In almost all religious traditions, gratitude is a manifestation of virtuous character. “Gratitude, as it were, is the moral memory of mankind,” wrote sociologist Georg Simmel. Scottish philosopher Thomas Brown defined gratitude as “that delightful emotion of love to him who has conferred kindness on us, the very feeling of which is itself no small part of the benefit conferred”. German theologian Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote: “In ordinary life, we hardly realise that we receive a great deal more than we give, and that it is only with gratitude that life becomes rich.”

The quality of being thankful implies the disposition to turn goodwill into action and the inclination to return kindness. A “thank you” denotes the attitude of positive acceptance, a determination to employ the kindness or blessing imaginatively and inventively. It connotes the humility of considering oneself the recipient of undeserved merit. “He who receives a benefit with gratitude repays the first instalment on his debt,” observed Roman statesman Lucius Annaeus Seneca.

Gratitude comes endowed with the power to help us create the life we want and can be therapeutic. Gratefulness emanates from looking at what someone or something has done for us. It is, therefore, about positivity of outlook, which, in turn, generates optimism and energy. Conversely, the lack of gratefulness breeds negativity and despair. In fact, proponents of positive psychology, a recent branch of psychology that studies the strengths and virtues enabling individuals and communities to thrive, consider gratitude to be a pleasant emotional state like happiness, joy, love, curiosity and hope.

The lack of gratefulness is largely because we take things for granted, brashly presuming that they are either our rightful due or are far less than what we deserve. What holds us back from being grateful is such lack of contentment and an endless craving for more. Often, we insist on waiting for the results of an action or a blessing to show up before expressing gratitude. This indicates a dearth of trust and faith, which pays us back in our own coin.

In a way, gratitude helps us realise the benefits of mindful meditation, which is all about acknowledging and feeling connected with every breath and blessing of life. Invariably, a life with gratefulness as its pivot is also a solution to the ills spawned by insatiable human yearnings.

We might wonder where the need for gratitude is if we pay for goods and services in money. Gratitude doesn’t even fetch us discounts. In fact, there is a subtle line of distinction between gratitude and ingratiation. So much so that when someone thanks us too many times, we start doubting his intention. However, as philosopher Adam Smith averred, gratitude is a vital civic virtue, essential for the healthy functioning of societies. He called gratitude a part of the moral capital required for human societies to flourish.

The act of offering and accepting an apology is as profound and healing a human interaction as that of expressing gratitude. But while the offhand “sorry about that” keeps flying around, our ego prevents us from realising its full potential. The word loses its impact when we refrain from acknowledging our offence (“Sorry for whatever I may have done”) or throw in a self-serving conditionality (“I am sorry if you were hurt”). If the purpose of an apology is only to say, “While I don’t think I was wrong, I will apologise because you say so”, it is best not to offer one, for, the worst we can do is to insult someone’s sensitivity or intelligence by such treatment.

Bestowed with the power to effect reconciliation and mend strained relationships, an apology must involve acknowledging the offense adequately, expressing genuine remorse and offering appropriate reparations, including a commitment to make changes. “A stiff apology is a second insult,” said novelist and poet G K Chesterton. “The injured party does not want to be compensated because he has been wronged; he wants to be healed because he has been hurt.”

The rewards of an apology can only be earned, not embezzled. With everybody from convicts to public figures seeking its refuge, “sorry” is not a quickfix for things gone awry, but the starting point of restoring order. The use of this word must be backed by sincerity of intention. “Never ruin an apology with an excuse,” advises American poet Kimberly Johnson. Seldom does an apology sensitise us to the responsibility of not repeating the same mistake.

A sincere apology helps both parties achieve greater harmony: While the individual making an apology is disencumbered of guilt, shame and fear of retaliation, the one who accepts an apology heals his own humiliations and grudges, rids his mind of the painful preoccupations of revenge and generates forgiveness to bring about greater peace in his own life and in the lives of others around him.

Expressing gratitude and apology without necessarily being grateful or remorseful people is an exercise in futility. Shallow expressions of gratitude and apology are not emotionally evocative and end up producing the contrary result. Often, they are so disengaged and superficial that they fail to motivate altruistic action and positivity. What matter most here is honesty, generosity, humility, commitment, courage and sacrifice, for these qualities define our true dignity.

by Harsh Kabra here

SYNERGIZE ~ Creative Cooperation

Synergy means the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. It catalyzes, unifies and unleashes the greatest powers within people. All the habits or principles we are discussing prepare us to create the miracle of synergy.

Synergy stems from the creative process we pursue and it is also the most terrifying part because we don't know exactly what's going to lead. We don't know what new challenges we will find. It takes an enormous amount of internal security to begin with the spirit of adventure, the spirit of adventure, the spirit of discovery, the spirit of creativity.

The challenge to follow this principle is to apply the principles of creative cooperation, which we often learn from nature, in our social interactions. Our family life is an excellent platform to observe and practice this mode of endeavor. The very way a man & woman bring a child into the world is synergistic.

As in life synergy is of much importance in the work-dom of business. When we incorporate this approach is our business the outcome is sheer excellence. It helps us to release an incredible creative enthusiasm.

And once we have experienced real synergy, we are never quite the same again; we know the possibility of having other such mind-expanding adventure in the future. We simply open our mind to new happenings.

Never LIE ~ Truthfulness

Image by Michelle Brea via FlickrTell what you believe, what you are aware of. Tell what you know, no more, no less. It sets you into a more when you don't have to think twice. Never lie. Under no circumstances do you lie. Once you have got a reputation as someone who never lies you won't ever be asked to cover up, or cover for anyone else.

If you decide to lie for a living you have too many choices and decisions. Where do you draw the line? Do you only tell little lies? Great big ones? Do you lie to save yourself? others? How developed your lies be?

Can you see some problems? If you have simple rule-never lie- you have a default setting that requires no thoughts, no choices, no decisions, no alternatives, no picking, no jeopardy and not sleeping nights.

Never lie is really the simplest, cleanest, most honest approach to our working life and career. It stems from our habit of truthfulness. When we know we are allowed to talk according to our own knowledge and comprehension. When we know we are allowed to take actions according to own experience. And what better way to live a dignified life that advocates peace and semblance.

Always go by your principle of truthfulness. Always invite straight and simple way of living. Experience life in the light of truth.

SET PERSONAL STANDARDS ~ Code of Conduct

There are state-of-the-standard rules and dictum's. Then there are state-of-the-individual norms that we set according to our own ethos and envision. These norms are the state-of-the-individual reflection of our own being and remains our guiding force all through. Just jot down your own set of rules that you will try to abide by.

• I will not knowingly hurt or hinder another human being in the pursuit of my career.
• I will not knowingly break any law in the furtherance of my career.
• I will have a moral code that I will follow no matter what.
• I will endeavor to provide a positive contribution to society by what I do for a living.
• I will not do anything that I could be ashamed to talk to my children about.
• I will put my family first at all times.
• I will play by the rules at all times.

The above code of conducts are some examples we need to follow for a harmonious and respectful life. Not necessarily, all these above rules will suit our own course of actions. We may need or have a better set for our personal conduct, it should bracket superior traits that comprise positive and proactive elements we need to network and nurture. We must endeavor to be the very, very best we can at all times.